Jacksonville is Still Dead, Sometimes

The Art of a Failing City

Once upon a time, there was a substitute teacher at Englewood pining for the days when he would be awarded $39,500 a year to work seventy hours a week with no time for blogging, photography or a social life. While he skillfully maneuvered from one assignment to the next, he occasionally peered into student life to check the heartbeat of the school. While perusing the school newspaper, he found an editorial written by a student — a good writer. It read something like this: Our school doesn’t suck, our teachers don’t suck, our administration doesn’t suck, we suck. Students make the school.

Alternatively, “people make the Jacksonville.” This year’s incarnation of the Jacksonville Zombie Walk had less than 100 participants. We suck.

Excuses were made.

“It was overcast.” But, this doesn’t work as a viable excuse. If people who lived on the beach didn’t evacuate for a category four storm, why would clouds kills their motivation to dress like the undead.

“There was Octoberfest.” This is true. I can confirm that two out of my last three tinder dates chose the prospects of Octoberfest over joining me downtown to photograph zombies and attend halloween themed parties. In all fairness, that could be due to me being a bad date or ugly. Nonetheless, there is ALWAYS an option to drink at the beach.

I can’t criticize Octoberfest; I didn’t attend the event. But, I’m still skeptical that the majority of attendees didn’t turn what should have been a celebration of great beer (please tell me there was an impressive selection) and merrymaking into the typical twenty-two-year-old, Bud Light-drinking, grabassathon that occurs at Jax Beach every Saturday night.

Starz gets it, just watch the first thirty seconds.

I know it was merely a Zombie Walk downtown, but less than 100 people showing up is unacceptable. There were at least 300 people the previous year. Events and subcultures should be growing every year, not shrinking. These are signs of a promising city; Jacksonville is not there yet.

This city frustrates me because Jacksonville has a unique combination of features that would make it special anywhere in the world. Jacksonville’s wasted potential is a consistent source of disappointment. Sometimes, I want to punch it in the face.

Warm Water Beaches ✔

River ✔

Nice Downtown Area ✔

Great Events ✔

Cool Spots ✔

Great People ✔

Community

I’m not an expert on fun, travel, culture or life, but I have noticed one huge factor that separates cities like Seoul, Tokyo, San Francisco and Chicago (places I’ve lived or visited extensively) from Jacksonville: community. The problem with Jacksonville is not what is already here, we have more than enough. The problem is that we fail as a community. We fail to make smart decisions. We choose to stay close by or repeating the same activities instead of exploring different parts and facets of our vast city. There’s nothing wrong with Jax beach; it’s a great place. However, does that mean we can’t have a successful Zombie Walk or enjoy our beautiful downtown area? When will we choose both? When will we choose to be better?

Jacksonville can be more than just Bud Light and a beach.

Despite my rant, I would like to thank everyone who participated in the event. It was still, as all zombie walks tend to be, an awesome time. Few things are as thrilling as watching a flood of zombies inundate the streets of downtown. I found the interactions between zombies and the patrons at Hooters particularly amusing.

On the positive side, I did learn two things. First, people actually go to The Landing to eat dinner at night. I can’t confirm if these people were local or tourists, but I was surprised to see bars and restaurants partially full. Secondly, Hourglass Pub serves a very tasty Long Island Ice Tea using a combination of wine. Mixing wine should be a terrible, terrible idea, but kudos to the bartender for pulling it off because it was absolutely delicious.

Below are a few pictures from Zombie Walk. I hope to see more people next year and don’t forget that WasabiCon is October 22nd and 23rd.